当年我在亚视跑龙套

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抽完一支烟，烟雾弥漫在周围，趁着几杯酒的余力和一支烟的朦胧，我想在键盘上敲下点东西给你，毕竟就这么关机然后换卡对你有点太过分。最近一直关机，也关了那个什么短信呼来去呼去的东西，我想是因为我真的不会再在乎你了。以前说关机却把那什么开了，现在想想那是因为那时我还在乎你，我还在乎你在不在乎我。

  前几天同学聚会的时候，他们问我有没有男朋友，我当时闷了。嘴上回答没有，心里在想到底有没有啊。他们说我骗他们，他们说像我这样的人不会没有，他们说我应该有一个。那天喝的差不多的时候，我好想打电话问你，我到底有没有男朋友。

  你是除了我爸第一个吻我的人，我一直不肯放下你，我以为你会渐渐学的在乎我，关心我。我不是咄咄逼人，我不在乎你有多好，多优秀，可是我在乎你对我有多好。我知道是自己对你的要求太高太过分，我知道你很忙，就像爸爸他整天在外面，我知道他很辛苦很累，所以我不去惹他生气不让他担心，但是他至少每晚回来还会走到我房里说几句话，早上进来帮我盖好被子。我很好满足很好哄的人，我不知道一天发几条短信打个电话对你来说是不是很困难？

  觉得我们不合适在一起是在国庆前，所以一直都不承认自己喜欢你，现在借着酒力我想告诉你，我才敢告诉你，所以直到今天我才肯放弃你。我曾经以为有了你我可以不走他们铺好的路，我可以过自己想过的生活，我一直不肯承认治疗酒糟鼻到底需要注意些什么自己错了。现在我明白其实他们为我做的选择永远比自己选的要好，至少可以把委屈大声地毫无顾忌地哭出来。

  最近家里又出事了，我一个人真的撑不下去了。我开着QQ，我多么想你会跟我说几句话，哄我几句，可是你不会，你已经这么久没有消息了。

  我们班主任说女人吸烟的样子很迷人，我现在点最后一根，好想让你看所谓的迷人。你是追我的人里最不在乎我的人，偏偏我又选中了你，是我太任性，我以为我会让你在乎我，我输了，输了自己也输了你。

  真的是最后一根，抽完这根，我就忘了你，开始我应该过的生活，这次是心甘情愿的，再也不会反抗了，也就再不会这么委屈的哭着找烟。

u生迟家1

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